This year has been a huge learning curve for me regarding inner growth and self belief.
I’m very much a positive person and would sit for hours with someone who’s feeling down to make sure they leave filled with positivity and ready for the challenge. I know the importance and rewards of positive thinking yet the last few years I’ve living without implementing it fully myself.
Fear is the word that came into mind lately, not of competition or figures, it’s fear of believing. I know this sounds utterly ridiculous by the way. It’s where you want something but apprehensive to put your whole faith into it for fear of disappointment. I guess that’s how I can only describe it, which is frustrating as I know exactly what I’m doing wrong.
Trust and believe.
Trust that you can have what you want, it may not happen right now or in a year but Believe that it will happen.
I’ll give a few personal examples of how this has worked for me.
Before I understood energy and thoughts, things would happen that were beyond coincidence. This may seem off track but this is where I started to understand and believe in the mind at a young age, more than a decade before I’d even heard of the Laws of Attraction.
I remember being around 14-15 in town with my friends and a woman walked past who looked like my mam, I went to shout and realised it wasn’t her then seconds later my mam came around the corner, which was odd at the time as she usually worked a Saturday. This happened twice in the space of a few months, I didn’t tell anyone as I thought naively ‘ I must be psychic but no one will believe me’ oh the 90’s…
Then it started to happen with other people, ones I wasn’t as close to, I had no idea what it meant but knew it definitely relates to thoughts.
As I got older I started wanting all the things my friends had but my dads unpredictable work contracts meant we couldn’t get a lot of the stuff me and my brother wanted. So instead of moping around I was determind to get a job whilst still at school, everyone said I’d not find one but I did. I then went onto collage and took on 3 jobs as I so badly wanted to drive. I got the lessons and passed first time.
I so badly wanted a car, I asked my dad but his reply was “if you want a car you’ll have to work hard for it”, rightly so but I mean I was annoyed, mostly because my friends parents were buying theirs or helping them, but I thought ‘right then we’ll see’ and decided to apply for a job in accounts, a job I no experience in!! I wanted the job so badly that I believed I was going to get it, and I did.
Is that arrogance or confidence and belief?
I got the car but after time wanted a better one, so applied for a job as purchase ledger in accounts, my dad came with me and sat in my red Micra as I had the interview. “How did it go?” he asked, “alright” I said (in my non-matching suit btw) “I really want to get this so I can get a better car” I got the job having only had little accounts experience.
I worked and persevered through a couple of tough years and moved up to a better position and bought myself a (relatively new at the time,) Peugeot 206 CC, my own little convertible. Other than my son, and my home I’d say that was the proudest moment of my life. I even took it to my friends house and put the roof down so she could see it in all its topless glory. Pun intended.
Looking back I realise how hard I would think about something I wanted, I wouldn’t just have empty thoughts though, I’d go out my way to make it happen with tunnel vision in full force. I don’t even think The Rock could have held me back.
What I realised I’ve done the last few years is get side tracked. I’ve been focusing on too many things that aren’t important, diluting my energy into what I really want. I’ve been working hard, and I 100% believe it WILL get noticed, as I see changes already and trust that quality rises.
I’m learning to accept that I can’t have control of everything and it’s ok if somethings don’t work, but what I can control is my belief in something and my trust that it will work out. It’s not easy changing a thought process and as a British person it can sometimes feel awkward talking about something with confidence with the fear of sounding like an aground cock, you know, this type of situation – the friend – ” your hair’s looking lovely” you – “Ah it’s just because I’ve washed it hahahahahaha” awkward laugh.
Forget about what’s going on around you that doesn’t involve you, what do you want? what’s holding you back? how can you achieve it? is it the dream? honestly you can 100% do anything, it may take 1 step, it make take 500 steps, but it’s a step that you’re willing to take to get you to your dream, that there is in your control.
Your mind is the most precious thing you have, it controls everything, use it, if you feel insecure telling people your dreams for (that word again) fear of people disregarding it like trash then don’t tell people, write it down. Put a picture on your wall, whatever your goal or dream is believe it, even if you stumble at the first hurdle who’s to say the 4th won’t be bigger than you ever dreamed? failure is a shit word, you know why you don’t fail you learn.
Thomas Edison, whose most memorable invention was the light bulb reportedly took him 1,000 tries before he developed a successful prototype. “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” a reporter asked. “I didn’t fail 1,000 times,” Edison responded. “The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”
Have trust and believe.
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